A look on the inside

Seriously... what is HAPPENING?!?!?! I could not be more thankful for what God is doing right now. I want to share a few things that have come out of the Kona YWAM Base as well as share a few things that God has been doing in our very midst.

The sites that I am about to share with you have really been a result of God moving and stirring people on this very campus to fight for justice and give God's perspective to the world.

Please check out http://www.grassrootsnews.tv/  Many people from this campus have signed up to capture a story in countries all over the world as they come. Its news that comes from the positive perspective, so check it out!

Secondly... there are many people that come to this campus to learn about film and acting. This last Thursday we had the priviledge of watching the Sex and Money film by some people that I personally know (the Sex and Money crew.)  It is about the abuse of Sex and Money and how sex slavery happens in our very back yard.  Check out the promo video and their website http://sexandmoneyfilm.com/film/our-story/

There so many different things happening right now its unreal! The atmosphere of this campus is shifting and its changing things around the world! There is a coropate hunger for Holiness and Freedom! My hearts jumps with gladness and I feel like weeping all at the same time because the time has come! So many people on campus have made a vow to only speak words of faith. No grumbling or complaining and to ONLY speak what builds others up. Never tearing someone down, especially when they are not present.  It makes my heart so happy... I am working on this as well. I want to be completely pure and blameless, its not easy but I am making that vow.

Psalms 15

Lord who may dwell in your scanctuary? Who may live on your holy mountain?

Those whose walk is blameless, who do what is righteous, who speak the truth from their hearts; who have no slander on their tongues, who do their neighbors no wrong, who cast no slur on others; who despise those whos ways are vile but honor whoever fears the Lord; who keep their oaths even when it hurts; who lend money to the poor without interest and do not accept bribes against the innocent. Whoever does these things will never be SHAKEN.

We as a body of Christ are beginning to understand and believe who we are! We are starting to understand the authority that Jesus has given us! Identity! Identity! Identity! I recently have had an experience that I will never forget. Actually the past few weeks are hard to even put into words. About a week ago some outreach teams came back and shared some stories. It as a night that imparted Faith big time! Every team had big amazing stories to tell! They saw people give their lives to the Lord and people be raised from the dead! The Power of God was being manifested! Like I said its really hard to put into words what He has been doing. I came back from that meeting with so many questions in my heart. I have never been in a season like this in my life and it was a little bit uncomfortable. What does the Trinity really look like... who is the Holy Spirit? God isn't an emotion but when the Holy Spirit comes, people experience emotions and feelings? God what is happening to me?!?! As I walked back to my room, I felt encouraged by the words that were prayed over me; but as I reached my room... I started experiencing something that words will never fully explain. I laid on my bed and fear started to come over me.... I felt like I was in a foreign land... I felt all alone.. but not isolated... it was so strange. I felt almost like I was in space and the vastness of it was never ending.  It was the spiritual realm and I knew that anything I said would shift something and angels and demons would respond. I KNEW that everything God said was going to happen and everything He says to us, without a doubt, is TRUE. I suddenly knew that our God, our religion has more authority and power than all other religions and spirits in the world! All at the same time I felt like I didn't know God because it was all too big for me to understand and so un-familar to what I already knew God to be! He is SO BIG! It changed my life!

The times we live in are like any other! This summer, us on the YWAM campus are so expectant for God to move in ways that we have never seen... We get excited but its so much more than hype, its reality and people are going to be set free from fears, anxieties, hurts and pains, physical healings, experiencing God that blows our mind!!! People are going to have more joy and life in this world than they ever thought possible, all because of JESUS! It starts with us! God really loves to hang out with us...its all about relationship and he's showing it! It blows my mind! I did not explain what is going on justice. Ill end it with this...We are expectant!

The sandals on HIS feet... Israel Continued

 Before we headed out to Jerusalem.. we went to a town called Natania...pretty sure I spelled it wrong... anywhoo... we had a contact out there that had invited us to help out with a food drive that they normally do. So we packed our bags and headed out. We arrived and immediately started setting up tables and the items to be given away. This food drive was not a normal one... this one was special and we were privileged enough to be a part of it. We were giving a way food, soap, heaters and such items to Holocaust Survivors. It was all very organized. They slowly came and grabbed the items from each table and were offered cookies and free literature about Jesus if they would like. Mind you there is a law in Israel that when giving away free items, Christian material and the Gospel cannot be forced upon the people. It can be available for them to freely choose to take. As well as, it is illegal for someone to share the Gospel and convert a person under the age of 18. I may have not worded those laws to the best of my knowledge but I would encourage you to check those out.  This was so amazing to me...I couldn't communicate with any of them because they all spoke Hebrew...all I could say was Todah... which is Thank you. I really wanted to be able to sit down and have a conversation with one of them. I am sure I could learn so much from them that it would change my life forever. I also wanted to ask them how they felt that I... a blonde haired, blue eyed German, was giving them food... there were definite moments I wanted to slip down my chair because I didn't want them to think I was anything like Hitler. I guess that is a big testimony in itself. To be honest that was a great but hard day for me.They all came and some stayed to listen to the music and grabbed some literature. After the long day, we cleaned up and headed to Jerusalem.

The Old City In Jersalem

First day in Jerusalem... wow so much different than Tel Aviv. I didn't mention it earlier, but Tel Aviv could be compared to LA. The reputation that we heard of, was it had a huge night life on the beach. Much partying and things of the sort... they even had surfers! WHOA huge surprise to me!! So back to Jerusalem, We took the bus about 10 mins to my families place. It was amazing. They were so welcoming and hospitable. Another surprise was that we could basically look out the window and see Mount Zion... and the Old City. To tell you the truth... I don't have a whole lot of knowledge about what happened there. Just a few tid bits here and there, but when you gaze at that city and those hills... the reality of Jesus sets in your heart. Whoa do I know and understand Jesus what you did... and the reality of how difficult that was... pah hardly...Oh Jesus how I hunger to know you deeply!

We were so privileged that we were in Jerusalem! We really felt like God was going to be doing something in us very significant while in this place. We did not have as many things lined up, so we were very flexible with what the Spirit wanted us to be doing. As we walked along the streets and visited the upper room, temples, the wailing wall, and many other places we would pray in our hearts or under our breath. One specific thing that God had been giving me revelation and understanding, was that since I am a child of God, I am a carrier of His Spirit, where ever I am I have the authority to change the atmosphere by just existing in that place. God poured so much life back into my heart while I was there and I was able to bring that to streets of Israel. God put so much joy in our team and we carried it every where we went. People noticed. A little side note, one of the strongholds and common thing I noticed was that the people are impatient and seem to be offended quickly. I had so much confidence that since God was encouraging us, as a team, to just enjoy ourselves, it was changing the atmosphere. We were moving things in the spiritual realm by just letting God be released in us. It was the most freeing, life giving trip I have ever experienced. My heart was being tugged by the people and the place.

We went to a church on Shabbat,  to the church my family attends. For those you that do not know what Shabbat is, it begins at sun down Friday night and ends on Saturday night when 3 stars appear in the sky. Its the day of rest and one is not allowed to work the slightest bit. They follow this strictly because God calls his Sabbath day Holy.  As we pulled into the parking lot, my relatives had shared with us that some Jews had previously lit the church on fire because of this conflict between Christians and non messianic Jews. We met a few contacts there to see what other ministries we could find to make available for future teams. Our team was prayed for at the end of the service to welcome us into the land.

A few days before we had to leave Jerusalem, Sam received an invitation to a prayer room that over looks Mount Zion, from a friend he had previously met. Our team went for a set that began in the evening and it was so refreshing. One of the leaders of the place had given a word... and honestly I do not fully remember a lot of what he said because I was so preoccupied with what God was working out of my heart... Which by the end he began to share about our offenses and how that hinders us from running into the fullness with the Lord and others. Which was exactly what God had been trying to get out of my heart. That night was so refreshing. The Lord is doing so much in Israel it would blow your mind. And I believe for the followers of Jesus in Israel, its a deep reality for them. They are living and walking and doing ministry in the land and with Gods chosen people! How incredible is that! Before I forget, while staying in Jerusalem, we had the opportunity to go to the Dead Sea! It probably was one of my biggest highlights! It is the weirdest strangest thing! You float and you dont even have to try! We as well bout the mud and covered ourselves. My skin and hair felt amazing afterwards! So, if you ever feel like going to a spa, just head to the dead sea and it should do the trick!

After a week in Jerusalem... with anticipation and sadness we had to pack our bags and head out to Karm'iel, which is only 30-40 mins away from Mount Carmel. We had a few contacts lined up but they fell through, so we tried to head to Mount Carmel by bus... but the bus driver told us to get off at the wrong stop and we got a bit turned around. Oh the adventures in different countries! They always make me chuckle inside. Chuckle thats a funny word... So we finally made it to Mount Carmel but not to the historical site. After about an hour or so of traveling and  getting lost with buses... we just went to a mall to meet up with a potential student we would have here in Kona. It was nice to be with someone who could speak the language and get to know the culture a bit better. Even though people get impatient quickly... the culture is very laid back when it comes to restaurants. We never were given our bill unless we asked. It was very easy to just enjoy yourself. It was a nice way to wind down our trip. Our last night we went to a town that really seemed like in the middle of no where... and attended the most amazing church where they sang in Hebrew and blew the Shofar! It was INCREDIBLE! OH my heart just came alive seeing all these things! I could go on saying much more stories but that may have to come at a later time. Thank you all for your prayers and support! Its all building up the Kingdom and for a purpose that is greater than us! I pray that God is moving in your heart and giving you life and revelation just as He has done mine from this trip!

The sandals on His feet... Israel

So here I am back in YWAM Kona, wow what journey the Lord has taken me on!! We have begun staff training and it has been incredible! I know that all of you are wondering what happened in Israel. I will try to explain as best as I can.

On May 11th, Kristi, Chantal, and I flew about a 20 hour flight from Kona  to Israel, The Holy Land,"  with much anticipation!!! I honestly had no idea what I was in for. The only thing I had under my belt were the few things God had placed on my heart in going and the amazing reports I heard from close friends. We flew El Al from LA straight to Israel... we had a connecting flight so, we already had our boarding pass and getting to our gate. To our surprise.. we were supposed to go through some intensive security. Since we didn't, when we approached to entrance to our plane, we were taken aside questioned and searched. To say that I was not a bit nervous would be a straight up lie. I slightly felt like I was a criminal... After trying to seem intense and scary (to make sure we did not have a bomb) they kindly gave us back our passports and said "enjoy your visit to Israel." All I could do was laugh inside.

Our long... very long 14 hour straight flight, with very good food and fresh bread I might add... we MADE IT TO ISRAEL. Sleep deprived and crazy hair, we landed in a place that is unlike any other. The Holy Land!

My heart didn't know what to do. All I knew is that I was ready! Whatever God had in mind.... I hope that I was ready! We arrived in the airport and had to go through customs, which surprisingly was easy... and they automatically give you a 3 months visitors visa... INCREDIBLE! We then gathered our things and headed for a taxi and rode to our hostel in Tel Aviv. I couldn't get things straight in my head. I could tell that we were no longer in America... but it was nothing like India. All the signs are in Hebrew or Arabic, but the streets are clean and the roads are organized! We spent the first day just cleaning up and making sure we did not fall asleep to adjust with the time difference but we had  not slept for about 2 or 3 days! Oh but if felt so good to be where we were. It was beautiful. Every part. Our team, the place we were staying, the country... just everything. My heart was getting so full. After a full nights sleep, we headed for old Jaffa. We walked along the Mediterranean Sea  which is supposedly where Jonah had sailed and just took in our atmosphere. There is so much rich History there... and I wish I could tell you more about it.... This trip as you will see made me extremely hungry to know more about this place and the people! We walked along very old cobble stone streets and walked through old stone buildings. I couldn't wrap my mind around the things that had taken place on those roads and in those buildings.

God told us that there were going to have wonderful surprises on this trip and one of them was that I was able to run into my friend Jan, whom I did my DTS with, at a coffee shop that does ministry.  Along with
finding out I had family that we could stay with! God is so faithful!

Finally after 2 days, our friend Sam arrived and joined the team! We met up with a few contacts that we had and heard what their heart was for the people and what sort of ministries they have. We went to a prayer room that over looked the city! I was blown away! How INCREDIBLE! They are the real deal out in Israel! A little side note... I think Israelies are HILARIOUS! While we were waiting to see our contacts, I met an older man in the coffee shop who didn't speak English. He asked me what my name was... I told him Shawna... he responded " Shoshana.." I said no... Shawna... and he said "YES! Shoshana!" Oh I said and he began to sing a little tune to Shoshanaaaa ohhh Shoooshannnaa. I found out with a translator a few minutes later that it means good smelling flower and there is a song about it... ahhaha I felt the Lord just blessing me through that... besides it just being humorous!

While in Tel Aviv, we would worship and pray for the nation, the people, and each other. God was so gracious. He repeatedly kept telling us to just enjoy ourselves. We started out one morning just laughing at things for about an hour... God gave us so much freedom and JOY! I was amazed! I was loving it... all we could do was laugh. Mind you, we were a bit delirious with jet lag and lack of sleep... we thought everything was funny... we have a whole list of random quotes we said... that most don't make sense or are just ridiculous in a little barbie notebook... haha if you want to know... just ask me.

Being in Tel Aviv for a few days, we took a shrut to Jerusalem. We got dropped off at the wrong place... but quickly met up in the right place with my family, that I had never met before... talk about interesting moment... haha. We arrived at their place and quickly went to bed. Lots of moving around and laughing so much takes a lot out of you. This trip was such a faith journey. We had a few contacts but a lot of it was just trusting the Lord and allowing him to guide us where we needed to be. Especially with finances! To be Continued!

And HE slipped away pt2

Israel...the Holy one of ISRAEL! Israel...I am going to ISRAEL! I know I haven't spoken much about this trip. It has been tossed around quite often between the gals that I am going with, but did not really have firm details set in place until a week or so ago. We now have a team blog called Awaken Israel. While in Israel, we will all be updating from that blog. So please go and check it out. I mentioned in a previous post the things that God has put on my heart for Israel, but I will share again. When ever I sit and think about our trip to Israel, I feel Gods heart for us is really to GO. I have this sense of urgency...the time is now. Although part of the reason we are going is to scout out the land to take future outreach teams.I believe this trip, although short, is going to be much larger in perspective than we think. When I first left for Australia to do my DTS, I longed for a different perspective on the world, because all I had known was what it looked like from the American side of view. I believe God is going to break our boxes as we go to Israel. Take us deeper. As He takes us deeper, we will be able to champion and impart that to our students coming in July and fellow staffers. We are going to worship and pray over the land. We are going to declare scripture over the  land! We recently have had prayers answered and Sam Choi who staffed the Awaken DTS' with us last year is going to come with US! PRAISE! We are still in need for $2000 person for flights. Pray for us as we go on this 3 week trip, May11th-30th.

Chantal Marquez

From Denver, CO. I have a huge heart for the nation of Israel. I love to see God moving in peoples lives and simply amazed that He allows me to be a part of it. I enjoy a good cup of coffee, good conversation and talking about the Lord and what He is doing in my life, your life and the world. His love is never ending and always enduring. I can hardly wait to see what He has planned for this time in Israel.

Kristi Zboncak

From Wheaton, IL.  Jesus completely altered the course of my life through His unrelenting love. My heart is for broken women and teens and I long to see the Lord bring restoration to their lives and hearts.

  Sam Choi- Staffed last Awaken DTS and is joining us on this journey.

Many times in Scripture,  Jesus slipped away in solitude to pray. I feel that is the season he has called me in. Being intentional about slipping away to be with him and pray. Without getting away with him and being alert to what he is saying... I would not be in the place I am. The things he has been speaking to me have been so full. I am excited to go to the Holy Land. To understand to context behind so many things that Jesus spoke in scripture. 

 CHECK OUT OUR ISRAEL TEAM BLOG  
http://awakenisrael.blogspot.com/

 

Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed. Mark 1:35

And HE slipped away.... pt 1

Prepare yourself... because this may be much longer than usual and God stirring!

My heart is so undone...at any moment that I slip away with Jesus, his spirit is so close. Please listen to what I am saying... what I am saying is real. It is true. I am not hyping up some spiritual experience. This season we live in, not just people in YWAM, but people all around the world... something is shifting. I encourage you to ask him what is on His heart and really really listen. About 2 weeks ago, my spirit was wrestling... that is not a comfortable place to be... my spirit was WRESTLING.... and out of that my spirit groaned and tears fell. Why are we Christians?! What is the point of what we do?!?! Why are we not on the same page!?! GOOOODDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!! Ohhh JESUS! What is on your HEART!?!? What do you see?! I then went to the prayer room and God made my heart so hungry for PURITY and HOLINESS! I feel the ache of His heart. He calls us to be Holy as he is HOLY. He cannot let anything into his PURE kingdom that is unholy... he will spit the lukewarm out of his mouth. He longs to be with us... lets go get him... consecrate ourselves to be Holy as HE is HOLY! Be watchful for what you put into your temple.... what you think is funny, the way you spend your time. We represent a Holy God and he DESERVES it all. The reality is that we are preparing for our coming King. He is going to come back and I desire to be where He is! No complacency! No Settling! Let us be Sharp and Watchful!

I have felt convicted... My heart is zealous after God. I love him... but if I am not walking out what I say... walking out what I believe... what is the point of even being Christian? Its meaningless... faith without deeds is dead! Im sure you have heard this many times before... but I pray that as you read it that divine revelation will fall in your heart. If you are speaking things that you aren't intentionally trying to walk out and seek... its DEAD! (I am speaking to myself here as well) God isn't playing a game. Its dealing with LIFE and DEATH here... whether you believe so or not. God does have grace for us... but we need to kick passivity in the FACE!  I really believe that God is taking our team to a deeper place with Him... in the next 6 months or so... I believe its very crucial time to get with Him. Making sure we are putting on our armor. Making sure that our weapons are loaded and ready. For those of you that read my newsletter, I felt the Lord say that this year, is a year of breakthrough for the Body of Christ, all over the world. One morning I awoke, still in my half asleep stage and the first thing that I heard was the Lord speaking to me. "I am steadfast. I am Strong. I am steadfast, I am strong." He was speaking that over me and confirming to me that is who He is. There is nothing better to wake up to than to hearing Gods voice. Its the best way to start out the day. My heart was in the most amazing place all day!

I want to take a bit of a step back... in the midst of the Lord speaking so much to me. A few friends of mine, one weekend went downtown near the water, to simply hang out. We were sitting on a rock wall overlooking the water and praying for each other. Asking the Lord what was on His heart for each person. We were kinda wrapping it up and just talking, when all of a sudden this couple, that was very apparently drunk, came up to us. The man started making some crude jokes. We weren't sure how to respond. Even though we probably didn't seem like the most welcoming people in that moment... they proceeded to sit down with us. The man began to chat with the boys and the woman began to ask us girls many questions. My mind was racing, trying to figure out how to present my self to this woman. I wanted her to know Jesus. I wanted to up front ask her if she knows about him, but didn't want scare her. I wanted to to let her know I was safe.. so she kept the conversation going. She told us about her boys that she can't see... I could see pain all over in her eyes. She was so sweet and full of LOVE, but the lifestyle she was caught up in is just causing pain. She then continued to tell us that she has had seizures for 10 years and can't keep a job because of them and the pills she takes. I asked her if we could pray for her... at first I thought she said no... but then she quickly responded and so NO.. I don't mind! She was hungry. We began to pray for healing. I believe God is GOING to heal her! And then we went further and began to pray for her heart... and I looked down and saw tears just streaming down her face... I cannot tell you what that did to me. I felt Gods heart for her. I still do every time I talk about it. That woman was so raw with her pain... she didn't act like she had it all together... but yet most of us Christians try to act like we have to keep our pain inside... What happened to being raw with our struggles...? God used her to speak to my heart! My heart was breaking...  God... I am here... I was just sitting here downtown... they came up to us. They saw YOU in US! He opened the door. I was available and he used it! AH God I rarely make myself available to the broken... and it breaks your heart! I hate breaking your heart because I love your heart. The very next day... I sat in the same place for a couple of hours and another woman came up to me. I was again in awe of God. I only need to make myself available... they come. I want to live out what I believe...

I long to be like Jesus... repeatedly in scripture, Jesus slipped away in solitude to pray. He has been alluring me away... taking away earthly desires... It has been so hard to be with people because my heart is so longing to be purified. To be Holy. To prepare me for times like I just wrote about.

Please watch the video below... it may give you a better picture to what God has been speaking to me...and please stay tuned in the next day or so Ill continue part 2 and update about my trip to Israel.

I heard it!

Justice. Righteousness. Israel. Thoughts. Buzzing and Buzzing all over in my being. God has been speaking to me incredibly clear and a lot lately. My spirit has been more aware than I think it has ever been! I have been meaning to write an entry for about a week now, but I needed some time to wrestle and process the things God has been doing inside of me. Tomorrow is April 1st! I think I say this every entry but TIME FLIES! The first quarter of the year is over and new students come in next week! WHOA! I am currently working in student services where I help get students get here! I answer their questions and get their files processed. Peoples lives are changing, sometimes I'm not always aware of that but that is the reality!

Lately, God has been stirring in me about Justice and Righteousness. What is righteousness? How are we considered righteous? In everything God does, he does it with righteousness. I'm not fully there yet but God is moving! Along those lines... God is teaching me how to be vulnerable. How to honestly repent... you know as crazy and simple as it sounds... I had a revelation that I sin. I SIN.... YES  S. I. N. SIN! I make mistakes. I have faults that are unpleasing to the Lord but yet he loves me. He is patient with me. He is showing me things in my life that I can't just have as knowledge but must act upon. Faith without action is dead! Its not about knowledge or doing good works that saves you, but if you believe something and never act on it. What good is if for you to even believe it? Why would it even matter if you don't act upon it. It would become meaningless. Hes teaching me to walk hahaha. WHAT on earth? He is teaching me to faith walk... Its not easy but its freeing.

In the very beginning of this entry I typed Israel, well there is a very significant reason why. In the month of May, me and 2 other girls that I staff with are planning to take a trip to Israel for 3 weeks to a month. God has been pouring out things to what this trip will be about and it kinda blows my mind. But there are a few things that have to happen in order for us to go. Currently we are praying for a guy to go with us. That is a must. Secondly, I praying for the funds to go because as of right now I have zero towards that trip. That as well is a must. At the end of our Awaken DTS of last year, us staff filled out a questionnaire email and there was a question about what countries God had been speaking to us about. I would say that about 90% of us had said ISRAEL. When I heard of the idea of going to Israel with some of my staff I had instant peace about it.  I had previously never really felt a burden or a pull towards it but I believe God is calling us to go in this hour. Many of our other awaken staff are traveling across the USA to gain perspective on what God is doing in his church. It has been amazing. God is setting up almost all of our staff on some sort of trip that will be influential on where we will take future teams as well and gaining impartation. These are a few things God has been speaking to me about this trip.

• Proclaiming Scripture of the land, declaring truth, calling Israel back into its rightful destiny.
• Intercession
• Impartation. God will impart something in us that we will be able to in turn impart to our students and fellow staffers.
• Gain understanding on what God is doing in his people and what he longs to do on the earth.

I am really looking forward to this trip. After we get back we immediately head into staff training as Awaken staff. We will take time to focus and pray into our school. Build our community as staffers and pour into each other and then our school begins July 7th! This summer is going to be FIRE. God is going to bring I believe bigger revelation than we thought.

Prayers

• at least $2500 for Israel. Plane tickets. Housing. Food.
• Details for Israel
• To be more intentional with relationships
• Monthly supporters. Financially and Prayfully. Both are HIGHLY needed
• My biological Family
• Strength to keep focused 
• Clear communication with my Awaken family
• Consistent deep friendships
• Unity amongst my Awaken team, amongst other schools on campus, and in the body worldwide

Personal needs

• Clothing such as shorts and jeans. 
• Backpack
• New computer
• financial supporters
• sunglasses 

I pray that God is stirring your heart and taking you into a deeper place with him. I pray that you hear is voice clearer than you have ever heard it. I pray for provision and direction to where God wants you to be.

Shh.... Listen... Can you HEAR it?

What a week... I have been in Kona for almost a month now and its already been a wild ride. The first week I was here I was beyond excited to be back. I felt no trouble in my heart, what a sweet place to be. After all of the excitement began to wear off... God began to ask me some wrestling questions. I would look around and not know as many people because of all the new students here for the current DTS', my heart would sometimes feel lonely. Of course, this would trouble me. I then would go and pout to Jesus... hes so patient with me, and in that time he would ask me... "Shawna, would you still serve me if everyone on this campus rejected you?" Would you still give me all that you are, even when all of those people don't agree or love you? I didn't really answer, but repeatedly day after day, Jesus would ask me this question. I felt so convicted. My hunger for Jesus just grew. I realized that my mind has stayed stuck in that mindset of wanting to please man and be satisfied with what they can give me more than Jesus. My heart broke. My soul YEARNED. My flesh cried out. My spirit longs for more but my flesh argues. It makes me so sad when I see my self treat Jesus this way. I'd like to think I have it all together, but that is far from the truth. I truly want Jesus more than anything and I need Gods help to make my flesh die!

Allen Hood, a leader from the International House of Prayer in Kansas City, was here to speak to a school for about a week. He had a few special times of speaking in our prayer room that was open for all to come. The first night he spoke about the baptism of Fire and the very last night God revealed himself through the Holy Spirit in an AWESOME way. Before He even got up to speak, the spirit was heavy in the room. The reverence of God was showing up! We began to wail and cry out, we were birthing something in the spirit. My heart was aching because I felt like this deep deep groan needed to come out of me. I long for us all to be so undignified before the Lord, but I know my self I hold back at times out of fear... How lame is that! God was reminding me in that moment of the urgency and need for us to give everything fully over to Jesus. He kept saying to me, "I want to do a new thing!" Shortly after Allen began to share a few things that God has been putting on his heart. My spirit was so stirred and encouraged because God had been speaking the same thing to me. For those of you that received my newsletter I shared a little bit about this on there. The word God spoke to me about this was " a year of breakthrough." I felt as we step out and go after the things of God, he is going reveal himself in ways to the body that will leave us awestruck. The word that Allen had shared was that he felt like especially for YWAM that it is a new season. The last night a shift had happened. We need the holy spirit! No matter how much knowledge we have attained about him or history or earthly wisdom. WE need His HOLY SPIRIT TO SHOW UP! With out it we are dead!!!!! I am so thankful for it too. He encountered me that night. He has in many different ways before but this night was very very needed. I was so dry and thirsty. I have never shook like that before... the amount of peace that came on me was soo good all I could do was drink it in. A few moments later by body felt like I was on FIRE.... My hands began to burn. He started to burn away my anxiety. He was taking something off me that I cant really explain and putting on a new pair of clothing. I believe that night was a marking point of Jesus doing something NEW...not just in me but in the body. Many left that night making a deep real commitment to give it all away to Jesus. Making a covenant to never part from his side no matter the cost. That is what he desires. Loyal friends. Loyal lovers.

A couple days after Allen had left, as many of you know a Tsunami Hit Japan, Here in Kona Hawaii, and many other places. Around 10pm our Tsunami sirens began to sound. People began to come out of their rooms to see what was really happening. At almost every hour the alarm would sound. People that were below Kuakini Highway(which is the street at the bottom of our campus, we were ok) were evacuated. Many people had stayed up until 4 am to await this mysterious disaster. I on the other hand I didn't feel the need. So I went to sleep, well at least I tried. That morning I woke up not really knowing if anything happened because everything was quiet and no one came to alarm me of any damage. I soon found out that downtown was affected and before it was cleaned up, looked like a third world country. God began speaking to me. He was giving me deeper revelation about being awakened. He said I call out to those sleeping, awake awake o sleeper. I sound alarms. I am coming! Prepare yourself, I am coming my bride! But there are those who don't bother to listen. They say "don't bother me, nothing is happening. I am sleeping." But he came like a thief of the night and you knew nothing of it. You didn't listen because you couldn't see me. You did not heed the warnings.You did not listen, now the damage is done. I saw how I slept and the disaster downtown came and left and I knew nothing of it til I awoke, is what is happening in the spirit realm. So many are sleeping and ignoring the warnings that Jesus is giving us.  Hebrews 3:7-8 So, as the Holy Spirit says: "Today, if you hear his voice do not harden your hearts as you did in the rebellion, during the time of testing in the wilderness."  

Revelation 3: 12-14 The one who is victorious I will make a pillar in the temple of my God. Never again will they leave it. I will write on them the name of my God and the name of the city of my God, the new Jerusalem, which is coming down out of heaven from my God; and I will also write on them my new name.  Whoever has ears, let them hear what the Spirit says to the churches.

I want to be aware. More aware of what He is saying all the time. He is preparing a bride for when he is to return and I want to be able give Jesus everything no matter what the cost.


Shh... Listen... can you hear what the Spirit is saying...? Shh... Listen....